Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
