Texts From Last Night

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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life

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  (802): Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life http://tfl.nu/rdws
  Replies (37) Good night (894) Bad night (3343)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.

  (1-403): View more from Alberta, CA

  at least i was looking out for everybody

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  (403): You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone. (1-403): at least i was looking out for everybody http://tfl.nu/ilsz
  Replies (8) Good night (4694) Bad night (743)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.

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  (503): I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there. http://tfl.nu/oh3e
  Replies (19) Good night (4488) Bad night (735)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes

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  (860): I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes http://tfl.nu/kyj9
  Replies (23) Good night (4578) Bad night (983)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.

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  (651): Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you. http://tfl.nu/jbfy
  Replies (28) Good night (9193) Bad night (1509)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???

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  (702): If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy??? http://tfl.nu/4rkp
  Replies (30) Good night (831) Bad night (4983)
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  (805): View more from California

  The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break

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  (805): The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break http://tfl.nu/smih
  Replies (3) Good night (2887) Bad night (880)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?

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  (641): Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug? http://tfl.nu/o9ys
  Replies (16) Good night (1015) Bad night (3400)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.

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  (615): We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers. http://tfl.nu/6a3z
  Replies (6) Good night (2257) Bad night (897)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.

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  (337): Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday. http://tfl.nu/gphh
  Replies (1) Good night (1073) Bad night (576)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.

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  (410): Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week. http://tfl.nu/e9o5
  Replies (1) Good night (1035) Bad night (584)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.

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  (570): I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out. http://tfl.nu/9vp6
  Replies (7) Good night (2099) Bad night (544)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there

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  (419): you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there http://tfl.nu/8eig
  Replies (0) Good night (418) Bad night (596)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.

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  (704): My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong. http://tfl.nu/luq5
  Replies (2) Good night (867) Bad night (449)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.

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  (330): Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative. http://tfl.nu/cyri
  Replies (1) Good night (492) Bad night (353)

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