Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99

(415): View more from California

Recession joke.

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(734): View more from Michigan

dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks

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(904): View more from Florida

5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.

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(310): View more from California

He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(516): View more from New York

i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face

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(613): View more from Ontario

Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.

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(240): View more from Maryland

What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...

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