I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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