I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
