saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize