I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i will never coherently bang her
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
