Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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