why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
