trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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