and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
