Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
