i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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