Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
you will always have a special place in my vag
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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