he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
