Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
