no you cant smoke seaweed
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
