I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
