some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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