Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
They left me at home... I'm a liability
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
