Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
