I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
She needs sedatives and a leash
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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