I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Randomize
