Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
this hospital has no fireball
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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