I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
