how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
