I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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