so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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