all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
