He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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