Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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