Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
