you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
