Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I'm just crazy horny about you
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
My feet surprised me
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