you turned your livingroom into a bong?
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize