He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
