I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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