So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
