Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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