so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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