So drunk its hurt
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
