i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Just high enough for therapy.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Randomize
