i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Randomize