I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I look excited, but its just a facade.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
