Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize