giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize