physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
