kristin has been a bad kristin
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
i now understand why vodka
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
