Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
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We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
What a dumb baby whore.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
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I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize