we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
