I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
