sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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